Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Grower of Onions

In just a few weeks, it will be springtime again. And I will be 39 years old one week from Saturday. We're in the middle of our second Lent together. I do have additional thoughts and reflections on Lent in particular, but as some of you may already know, this particular blog isn't really the place where I prefer to keep them. Instead, I'll record some random goings on from life in general.

You know how you'll have a huge bag of onions and when you don't quite get to that last one in time, it winds up sprouting? Well, this time around, we elected not to throw the poor thing in the garbage for being resilient (and therefore less than edible). Instead, Seth planted it in a little pot and we named it Saul.

At present, Saul is hanging out on the little table we keep in the middle of our bedroom. I know he's just a sprouted onion, but I'm nevertheless reminded of how much I used to enjoy keeping plants and making things grow. I like observing the way Saul's little cylindrical onion leaves keep reaching out toward the sunlight wherever it happens to be at the time. (People really do forget that plants are living, amazing things.) We've been talking about maybe doing a little cleaning and straightening in our room so that we'll have places to keep more plants if we like -- some edible and others merely decorative.

........

I've been doing that Venus in Aquarius thing again, meaning I'm just not feeling the same way I used to about a lot of my current circle of friends. I'm changing. Yes, I'm still very much the person that doesn't really have any real goals or plans as far as life goes... but I'm also realizing that I'm growing up at the same time. The past ten years or so have changed me in certain ways and I'd like to think they're for the better. It's becoming harder and harder for me to relate to people that aren't really on the same page.

I don't have all the support I want (or deserve) in life by a long shot, but I do my best to be my best regardless. I take care of my responsibilities, even though I don't truly want any of them. I work hard to be an increasingly better writer and businesswoman. The more I grow in this area and the better I become at accepting responsibility for myself and for the people that are counting on me, the less tolerant I feel toward people that just aren't willing to make the same effort. That applies to a lot of people I once considered close friends at this point and I'm going to simply leave it at that.

I normally don't really want to see winter make its exit, but I don't feel too badly about it this time around. This spring, I'll be a recorder of lives and a grower of onions. And that's good enough for me at present.