I'm beginning to realize that I've been on a real self-improvement kick lately. In many ways, I'm probably just normalizing a bit after what in hindsight has been several years worth of soul-searching and reevaluating when it comes to what's truly important in my life. As I've alluded to in the past, a lot of that process has involved eliminating relationships, mindsets, and habits that really no longer serve me.
Now I'm working on rebuilding what's left and figuring out how I can get the most out of it. I want to become the best possible version of me. Better, happier, and healthier than I've ever been in my life. So far, I'm making excellent progress and that has me really excited.
Like a lot of people, I realized I could stand to be a lot sounder physically. Years of working at home behind a computer while simultaneously eating and drinking pretty much whatever I want has meant I'm not anywhere near as thin or healthy as I could be. Plus, I've just let a lot of little grooming things that were once important to me kind of fall by the wayside because I've had other things to worry about.
I just gave myself a fresh dye job and a new haircut. I kept my cartoon red because it made me happy. I ditched the ultra-long length because it didn't. I'm also working on taking better care of my skin and such. Plus, I've been using the S Health app my new Galaxy S5 came with to get on top of my calorie intake and whatnot. Seth and I have been doing that for a little over two weeks now and it's already paying off. I've lost 13 pounds so far.
Plus, I'm only getting fitter and more excited about making more progress, so I should be looking pretty good by the time Labor Day rolls around. I'd like to go beyond simply losing weight and actually sculpting a body shape I really, really like, so we'll see where my journey takes me in the future.
I'm happy to say that I've apparently gotten back in the habit of reading regularly again and my mind feels fantastic as a result. I have ideas again. I feel like I'm close to feeling really creative again. I'm excited about words, and writing, and artistic growth again. That was a big part of my personality in the past, so it's nice to see that it's not simply something I grew out of with age.
I'm trying to be a more well-rounded reader than I was before. I'm reading lots of fiction -- classics, contemporary, and bestsellers. However, I've been reading self help books, history books, and cookbooks as well. I'm also making good use of my Next Issue subscription and absorbing a ton of magazines. Currently, I look forward to reading Time and The New Yorker every week, among others. I actually feel like I know a bit about what's going on in the world! I also read a lot of monthlies -- beauty magazines, cooking magazines, fitness magazines. You name it and I probably read it these days. My mind feels full, and happy, and enlightened.
I can't recall whether I've ever really mentioned much about my ongoing spiritual journey in this particular blog or not, but I've definitely been experiencing one over the past year and a half or so. Once I reached a place where I was ready to let go of some of the ugliness from my childhood and my past, I started feeling ready to rebuild my relationship with God. That experience has been overwhelmingly positive for me.
Spiritually speaking, I guess I lean more toward old-school Catholic ways when it comes to interpreting the Bible, praying, and doing the whole church thing. I pray the rosary every day -- usually when I first wake up -- which is extremely relaxing and enjoyable to me. I also abstain from fish on Fridays, take in a Mass service each Sunday, and read the Bible daily. Seth does the great majority of these things with me, so it's been something nice we can enjoy together and use to become closer as a couple as well.
Overall, I just feel really, really good about how I'm growing and evolving in a way I don't think I have in a long while. I feel like I'm turning a real corner here. It's like I've finally purged some of the emotional poison that's been keeping down for decades and am ready to heal and become something new as a result. I thought I might have been irreparably damaged... but thankfully, that's turning out to not be the case. I can't wait to see where the future takes me next.